In The Air Tonight was playing in the dentist's office. Had to stop the cleaner to do the drums.
i walked into his room and he was eskimo kissing his weed..
you asked a group of latinas stood by the bar to hold a minutes silence for ugly betty getting cancelled. that drunk.
oh i have no idea about his personality. i imagine it's the same as it was- except now combined with a receding hairline and a beer gut
my mom took me to a gay bar and went on and on about all her good times at clubs... i now know where i get it
That was around the time you tried to kick me out for being rude to your fish.
You mean the girl who was passed out face down on the bathroom floor until 10 AM? You're right, she was cute.
votre penis est TRES GRAND. i used vous because your penis is SO big
Everyone is sleeping and i'm sittin here in my iron man mask, watchin chelsea lately and tryin to figure out how to smoke through it.
Just gave my pregnant cat a safe sex talk. That high.
I sent him a tit pic with the caption, "Mt. Arie and Mt. Hola are ready for expedition." Too nerdy?
Pretty sure I just noped a member of the Canadian women's hockey team on Tinder.
I needed to bring way more fireball to class to match this professors intensity
I need all the beers. I want to be holding on to the grass so I don't fall off the earth drunk.
Rough day
Good thing I've started drinking again
Randomize
