Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
he was wearing sponge bob boxers. Guess how long he lasted.
Chelsea handler, $19 million - Forbes women top 100. Seriously she shaped her career around her love of vodka. HERO.
Second day of summer classes and i already got this girl to send me nudes during class
that is WHY your in summer classes
worth it
They tried. Someone started to yell beer shower but he spun around and punched them in the mouth before they even finished saying beer. He's a fast little drunk.
You know how I got mad at him for making out with his formal date? Apparently I fucked mine. I'm guessing any exclusivity is out of the question.
it's only monday and im already failing all my classes. i give up. tequila tuesday is my only friend.
I'd like to request an "its my birthday discount", and for you to bartend shirtless tonight ;)
We're having play-off hate sex for a sport I don't even understand. Go USA!
He was "hot guy in the dark". One of us had to sleep with him. I took the bullet you're welcome.
Nothing says "happy birthday" like a negative pregnancy test
I'm not getting off this floor. I love this floor
My ex boyfriend literally just asked "who needs porn?". This is EXACTLY why I dumped his ass.
all i'm saying is don't blame me if your purses are filled with whoppers
are we talking malt balls or BK?
I know you won't see this for awhile, but I had to tell somebody, and you're like the only person who won't judge me for having an accidental erotic encounter with General Tso's chicken.
Randomize
