Hey sorry for feelin' up your date. Sadly, this is a mass txt.
dont try to nair your balls. i speak from experience
why did u have a candy cane hung on your dick in the first place?
she has a santa fetish
cute.
The vibrator you gave me is probably the one thing I will never give up if we got robbed at gunpoint
The lid of our salsa is promoting a contest that ended in July '09
running the faucet water is not hiding the sound of you vomiting. fyi.
My vagina senses are tingling. I know your here.
i just sent him like 8 different sexts and he texted me back about how good the hummus is that i left in his fridge.
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
she has like 12 pairs of underwear people left at her house from the other night
Her fortune said that she will soon be free. She's taking her bra off at the table.
The cops busted down the door and everyone ran. I was just trying to find my shirt before I got arrested
I'm just trying my hardest not to get addicted to drugs or pregnant and all your other friends are out there getting married
i just had diarrhea that people from the 1930's would have died from
So I had Xanax for breakfast & I'm probably going to fuck my tennis instructor.
Randomize
