Would it be too much if i wore depends to new moon so i dont miss any of it?
They were so loud I wrote them a sex critique and taped it to his door.
Bring your kids so they can distract our kids so we can drink beer in peace.
I may be the first guy in history to get dome while watching An Extremely Goofy Movie.
someone was throwing condoms at us.
no, they just magically show up around you.
No one will ever love me with the amount of puke on my hand
I was wondering, is there any way to hook up a lawn hose to a keg?
I didn't know he had a girlfriend until after we had sex when he said, "Man I really gotta stop cheating on my girlfriend."
She said she wants to move in with me. Time to black out and act as if we never had this conversation.
How are you a firefighter? People actually trust you with their lives??
I hear fucking Christmas music. I'm going to find fucking Santa and tell him to suck a dick and shut up for the next month
So my mind was like YOU ARE TOTALLY GONNA MAKE IT TO CLASS TODAY but then my body was all LOL NO YOU AIN'T.
As we have told you before, the first rule of hook-up bingo is we don't talk about hook-up bingo
Just kidding. Don't worry, you're getting sugar and orgasms for Valentine's day.
She really wants to put my dick in her mouth, and to be honest I really don't want to put it there.
The only thing good about being back at work is the lunch time hand jobs from the MILF
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