shaved balls and baby powder=awesome
Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
rhymes with "ouble enetration"
Waitress cut us off at Chili's bar. New low
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
just to let ya know we might have to take a stripper snowboardin sometime
Wait wait wait. I remember riding in her car to the next bar. On your lap. With my head on the dashboard. That probably should have been my cut off point.
The woman in the hospital bed next to me just got diagnosed with flea bites on her vag.
Whaaaaaat? No way.
Now a discussion of pigs vs. dog as carrier.
He told me that before I went to bed I needed to do my stretches and then processed to demonstrate a squat thrust, while completely naked.
Tried to put an eye patch on while hooking up with a girl. She was not amused.
She said she didn't feel right fucking on her parents dining room table I grabbed the only thing around bubblewrap she blew me for creativity
I'm really going to need you to stop yelling Campari.
I still have to bake cookies and shave my legs so Mike can have MILF & cookies when he gets home.
AND I NEED A VIKING FUNERAL OR MY GHOST ASS WILL SAUNTER ON OVER AND CASTRATE HIM FOR TECHNICALLY MURDERING ME
It's time you knew: I have been dating your probation officer for 7 months. Pretty certain he's THE ONE. So, thanks for being a criminal.
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