you know that hot chick that stutters? talk about an awkward orgasm
I got a lot accomplished today, and the day is still young! I built a fort, hot boxed a fort, had a tea party in a fort, and now realizing how high I am.
I made a blanket fort and am drinking Gatorade and eating donuts watching 500 days of summer. I can't keep spending my saturdays like this.
Also. This Ativan makes me feel fearless. I think we need an exciting new hobby for when we take it. How do you feel about ghost hunting?
The ideal thing to do next party is to tape my boobs down so they don't knock over the pong cups while playing defense. They came back to hurt us this time
He ripped off his socks and ran around the basement barefoot. His feet turned black. Then he chugged Parmesan cheese. He chugged dry cheese dude.
You sprinted into the side of a parked car
I wish I saved his nudes so I could anonymously submit them to his tumblr
He called his dick the "gentle giant"
I'm glad I can share my workout progress with you via my nudes
Sorry I twat blocked you earlier I didn't know Sam was over. But, my house my rules, I don't have to knock before I enter. I did see naked butts and smelt "Sex Stank" in the air, we're going to have to set some ground rules when I get home. Hugs and kisses..Mom
I'm actually pretty sure the amount of alcohol I drank last night erased memories from other times in my life.
You are cut off. Your giant penis and crazy awesome sex is ruining my body...
You think I could convince him that having sex with another girl isn't cheating?
You peed on a flamingo?!?
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