She is in my trunk
I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
my fake id says im a 34 yr old russian lady ... how is this working
could you please tell me why you thought vodka soaked band aids were a good idea?
I sang Jenna happy bday in the middle of throw up hurls
We found a swing set....it's in the front yard.
Our house almost burnt down last night. I woke up at 4:10am to the smoke alarm going off bc the bean bag chair was on fire so i extinguished it and smoked a bowl at 4:20 to celebrate my fire extinguishing abilities
Last thing I remember was wondering why there was a mirror on the wall behind the urinal and then realizing I was pissing in the sink.
Why did I just find out you and Andrew had sex right next to my face when I passed out on the beach?
At the time it seemed romantic and its also extremely frowned down upon to leave a passed out person by themselves in an unfamiliar place.
Why did I wake up by myself then?
Oh yes there is. Now I'm the sad one. Please organize my life. And I will demoralize yours.
There a special place in hell for drunk criers. A special FUCKING PLACE
The best was when you were crying, and trying to get the bouncer to "understand you AS A HUMAN BEING"
My mind doesn't wanna day drink but my heart does.
HAPPY BIRTHDAY I ATE TOO MUCH OF AN EDIBLE AND TOLD MY BARISTA I LOVED HER
How is it that 364 days a year I'm the adult, but on Halloween you completely forget how to have fun and become my grandma?
Randomize
