i just had sex bonerless
if my vagina gave out awards, he should be preparing acceptance speaches for the oscar, the heisman and the nobel peace prize.
He is going overseas for 8 months, not only was that blowjob a going away present, but i was supporting the troops
This show inspires me to have sex in space
So does it count as really great road-head if he ran over 3 mailboxes before realizing he was off the road?
She said I walked up to the McDonalds counter and ordered just a cup full of pickles then proceeded to offer some to everyone in the place.
Eating this pizza pocket is like eating out god
I just want to curl up with him and brush his hair and sing love songs together, I think you should come over and end this
She's in the bathroom. Literally just told me she could make a guy cum using just her words. Not bad for Sunday brunch.
How does she have a hairless cat and a husband it's not fair. Both are hard to come by
Time to eat Mexican food til I hate myself.
That's completely alright, I do it a lot.
Ever find a porn video so groundbreaking you mentally cancel all your Dick Appointments for the week?
Change of plans & whoring it up tonight
I WANNA... wait, will you kinkshame me?
Nah.
I WANNA KNOW WHAT HE SMELLS LIKE
We got high, had sex, and watched retro scooby doo shows. Best friends with benefits yet.
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