do you think they ever dumped Gatorade over Michael Vick's head after his dog won?
I have big tits. Rules don't apply to me.
Is it illegal to masterbate in an airport?
It's spring break, I'm sure it's ok.
So the girl in front of me was buying champagne too .. I wanted to be like "so are you celebrating clean test results too?"
the homeless guy was waiting for me this morning. this is the closest to a boyfriend ive had in years.
..But I'm still alive. And thats the main thing
If i ever start ordering tequila again please tackle me to the ground and steal my wallet
Btw. Made out with a random kid at a frat. It's all good though. He invited us to his frat party tomorrow so yay! For having plans!
Why would you hook up with someone whos known for peeibg in someones mouth
Apparently she has a 10 week old kid, which would explain the hallway effect I was feeling.
It is unclear if my flaming esophagus is hangover induced.
Of course I have a pirate flag
Maybe because you rubbed my clit while we were making churros
I came so hard I went blind for a few seconds.
the cop said "drunk and disorderly" like it was a bad thing
Randomize
