No, I'm only going to drink half my paycheck. That's the responsible thing to do.
She's holding my hand. I'm going to kill myself.
i dont need a football game to get drunk and yell at my tv
i don't think it's normal to still be missing spring break.
She tried to cook Velveeta IN the oven on clean mode.
wearing my roomate's scarf as a dress...halloween 2011 ladies and gentlemen
Look at my eyebrows in this pic! We deffo need to go back to that waxing place.
You have a cock in one hand and a shot in the other. Your eyebrows are not the topic in need of discussion.
I am still sore from last night. I can't wait for you to meet my parents.
There is naked swordfighting and something green and alcoholic going on in the basement. COME. OVER. NOW.
Ways to ruin a one night stand: the guy finds your parenting magazine on your dorm room desk.
Pride is not for the college student young Padawan. Tequila is for the college student.
I just realized I'm currently not eating carbs, drinking alcohol or having sex. 2014 is off to a horrible start.
That moment during finals day when you either convince your teacher to let you out of the room or you shit you pants.
I don't know if I'm dying or this is just a mild inconvenience
I know her cup size but not her name....
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