A little boy walked by his parents room one night, looked through the keyhole, and said "and that bitch tells me to stop sucking my thumb!"
we can't become the bulimic house in the complex dude. Besides, you need teeth for your career.
It wasn't until i was on my knees with three dicks in my face that i thought it might be a bad idea
and she was grinding on the wall, purring at guys she liked at the pregame...
She suggested that I come visit her in Europe and hook up with the heteroflexible Korean who sits next to her in class. Polylove is the best love.
Fair enough. I'm gonna finish off half a bottle of Brunettes in the shower anf relive the good ol' days. We need a reunion
I really want to lead this Amish guy into temptation
This wedding is gonna be a disaster. I already had to turn down one of the groomsmen who offered me $100 to sleep with him next wknd.
Too low?
Yes.
He wouldn't let me ride him with a Ninja Turtles hat on...
I am the kind of drunk to where i can still drive a golf cart
Turns out the old man beside me in the waiting room was dead, but other then that it was a good day.
Made up a full house drinking game
On my way.
with great strapon comes great responsibility.
When breakfast is a rum &coke at the office Christmas party you know it's gonna be a good day
outside on the street drinkin, walked into a random house and asked to pee, some kid hands me a beer and says i have to chug it first
Randomize
