I didn't go out last night, but I dreamed that I blacked out and the *CRAZY* thing I did was to eat 12 cupcakes off 12 diff plates and stack them up neatly. If I had a life, I'd hate it.
wow, i just saw a girl period all over the floor. get my shoes
Just met a guy who has been in college for 7 years and still classified as a junior. Then watched him shotgun 10 beers. Found my new hero
i like being sick. whatever the doctor gave me is awesone. the walls are waving at me. i never want to get better.
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
He said he got laid, but you and i both know he was too high to leave his house.
I just wanted to share with you that my life has come to naked arts and crafts, to fix my flask, with a rum and coke in my hand... Good luck on your exam
It's like god made him fantastic at oral to make up for what his mouth does the rest of the time.
She once gave me sex advice over the phone while intoxicated. So no you don't have the cooler therapist.
Just to let you know... If you ever want to get me a gift, the One Direction perfume comes out soon....... It's called Our Moment. It's an appropriate gift for a 25 year old woman.
Instead of more alcohol, I decided to drink tea. Lets slow clap it out for me
Welcome to the single world where it seems vibrator batteries are in short supply and making a sandwich while naked at 2am is relatively normal
that's the second time I've left that bar and slept with the person that's driven my car. thank god I don't take cabs..
all i've had to eat today is leftover bday cake and a shot of tequila.
welcome to college.
That dick was not the dick of a twenty year old
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