Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
I feel violated. a guy just did an ultrasound on my balls. He made eye contact..
so she finally agreed to being friends with benefits. not only did I take her virginity, when I woke up, she brought me French toast made with homemade bread in bed.
I worship thee.
Our adventure is going to pick up his pipe and weed that he ditched when he got pulled over the other day.
HOT DATE.
He told me he wouldn't do any drunk sluts but me. I guess that's sort of a compliment...?
she refused to get out of the dog cage till we sang "be our guest" to her.
I might never shower again without beer.. I might also always drink naked
I will forever be haunted by the image of you hurrying to finish your Jimmy Johns sandwich in the Taco Bell drive thru so you could proceed to order $17 dollars worth of shitty Mexican food.
woke up wearing a canadian flag with the starting forward of the hockey team. i feel oddly patriotic
I'm gonna have sex with my clothes on and I'll know everyone there so I'll be in my comfort zone
I just realized that I have dated 5 unemployed guys...and 3 that drove pt cruisers...Turns out I do have a type.
I'm covered in glow paint and I can't find my shirt. So, successful night
Shia LaBeouf arrested in austin for public intoxication. JUST DO IT
It's official. My little brother has had more sex in my car than I have. I'm still tied with my little sister. I hate everybody.
His face will be in my vagina later so I'm willing to forgive.
Randomize
