If it makes you feel better, you're better at taking it in than ass than she is...
Well...yeah actually, that does make me feel better
fyi, if youre wondering if offering a female police officer sexual favors will get you out of a ticket, the answer is no.
My family just suggested tequila shots. I had Vietnam style flashbacks.
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
Last night we looked at each other with an expression of "fuck I am so done being normal", took off our shirts, and danced around in our bras
She looked at me and said "i like penises." and then passed out with her condom balloon animal in her hands.
He just stared into my eyes and touched himself. That isn't hooking up.
Well, I tried to shit into my refrigerator. It was a rough night.
I say that because you at one point were like a mama spider covered with baby spiders only you were a man covered with strippers.
Drunk texting is the poetry of my life
I got your flops too. But yeah you rolled off your raft a bunch of times so we had to ask the white trash squad to help you back on. You bit one of them
Don't worry, I'm sure your thrusting skills are on point.
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
if I start to respond to these political texts with a middle finger emoji - do you think they will get the hint?
I shit myself and fell down the stairs and I’m still finding shit In those pants.
Randomize
