I must have had a great time last night.. I woke up with coconut oil all over my glasses
she refuses to pay for the plan b and so do i. it's the most dangerous game of chicken i've ever been involved in. but i have my pride.
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
four loko is apparently banned in the us. so i think its time for us to stock up. i already emailed them about buying them in bulk
the fact that i fell through a skylight is the least humiliating part of the night
I am 100% positive that I have seen a porno that was shot in this bar.
don't forget friday is see who can get the most free drinks at the gay bar contest. winner gets $50
Everybody knows the last week of summer internships include showing up to the office hammered and hitting on the CEO
All I I know is that there's 2 new contacts in my phone. Drunk Backdoor and Gayass Handshake. Thanks, Jameson.
Excuse me while I download incredibly disturbing porn until I'm more ashamed of myself than of my country.
I accidentally walked in the wrong house but I somehow left with a chicken leg. Good fucking night.
Thanks for setting a pic of your balls as my desktop background. You'll find you're cc'ed on the mass email of it.
I just want to slap everyone in the face that's happy being sober. Loser.
Fuck me first. Then we can craft and watch Terminator 2.
If I hear you use the phrase "silky soft scrotum" one more time I swear to God you'll regret it
Randomize
