just saw a girl with a lower back tattoo of the boondock saints prayer.. i will marry her
apparently i told her i wouldn't press charges if she brought me food.
Dude she was 62...with a boob job. And I'm proud to say I made out with that.
On an unrelated side note: I shall now attempt to crawl to the bathroom. Where I will lay motionless on the cold ceramic bathtub with hot water pouring over my shivering body as I desperately try not to vomit. Good day.
Yeah Greg found him eating out of a tuna can with a pill cap
let's remember the whole point of NYE: to drink antisocial amounts of antisocial drinks, become incoherent, ruin a carpet, talk to a tree, wake up with head sellotaped to toilet. The where/how is superfluous, my vote goes to a cupboard and a bottle of jaeger Questions?
I have too much respect and admiration for my dick to put it into a situation where he could possibly be killed
Oh my god. I'm not ready to be an adult. I'm not ready.
Licking pop rocks off a stranger's washboard abs and kissing strangers young enough to be my kid. Yeah, it was THAT kind of party last night
PUT YOUR FRESHLY SHAVED MEXICAN POON ON THAT BEARD. NOW.
I'm going to fix your towel rack. I broke it while I was dancing on it.
He said it only counts if it ends up on the internet
Afterwards I drank a whole bottle of cake vodka in the bathtub while he was bawling his eyes out. Hands down weirdest hookup I've ever had.
just blew him in the library. I am a classy dame
We had sex then laid in his bed eating chocolate and drinking juice boxes. I think I'm going to keep him around.
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