ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
Shiiiit I think I'm getting sick. probably had something to do with the fact that i shared my mouth with everyone last night.
Wait. That came out far sluttier than I intended.
He just found another high guy at wal-mart. There now friends. His friend is eating a cupcake
If her puking on your pool table is her sign of a good night, it's time to intervene.
I don't care how drunk you were. Sending me a pic of your dick dressed as Uncle Sam with the caption "I want you" isn't an acceptable pick up line.
If you're not peeing in public bi-monthly, you're not really living.
We should discuss this later when sobriety has returned. Right now he's just like a distant cousin.
But how do I turn off the feelings though?
Vodka.
They started shooting fireworks out of a dryer. It was my cue to leave.
Like you can't just be like oh bb and THEN SEND ME A FUCKING PICTURE OF MY 8TH GRADE FAT SELF IN A TACO COSTUME
plus like he's kinda a piece of shit. a beautiful somewhat talented piece of shit that hella needs to get his life together
Don’t fucking talk to that dude from monday!! Ethical consumption dude, don’t fuck shitty guys
I was literally so lonely last night that I stopped watching a video on porn hub and just read the comments
I've seen too many naked penises for this to be a normal Monday morning
I'm sorry I missed your birthday brunch. If it makes you feel any better I woke up wearing someone else's toga and a sombrero
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