I understand how i shit in my shoes, but explain why you were wearing them.
How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
When she can manipulate the direction of her leg hair, you know its time to leave
everybody makes mistakes
i didn't know they allowed you to text in ambulances
You seriously looked at the house acorss the street and implied that you thought they had nice Easters.
I am trapped in a bar with french tattooed drug dealers who also blow glass art. Just in case this is bad, know what happened.
i get the sense she is planing new and exciting ways to physically harm me during sex
Matt you can be anything you want to be. Including the awesome guy that brings pizza to a bunch of stoned and sorta drunk kids.
she just nodded and said "yeah, I'd fuck him for a reese's peanut butter cup". it's so nice to know I'm not the biggest whore living here
Can we go to the gas station to get cigarettes before we get drunk. It's hard enough to say Marlboro sober.
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
I had the choice between 9 burritos and 1 girl...
And...?
My husband gave me a key to his house. I thinks this means we're getting kinda serious.
we panicked because we couldn't find you anywhere, but then we found you tripping in the bathtub with Marie's cat. there was no water. you thought there was water, though.
You hear the wildest shit in a Walmart bathroom.
Randomize
