It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
the chair was smiling at me in sociology and i had to try not to burst out laughing.
You have to understand, this is the first time I'm looking at a whopper sober.
I just inadvertently flirted with my coworker's 20-year old son. I've known him since he was 14, yet suddenly he looked different.
You are nothing if not reliable.
He just invited me over to bang on a sunday afternoon. If I can make it top the time I went to a strip club on fathers day then I'll consider it a success.
THAT IS NOT SOMETHING YOU TELL SOMEBODY THE FIRST TIME YOU MEET THEM IN THE DARK.
Any story that involves the words "bloody hand job" and/or "sliced penis" is bound to be a good one, right?
Letting Freddy Krueger eat me out = HAPPY HALLOWEEN TO ME!!!
You'll be happy to know that the bruise is gone from my cock
I'm good. Got my nipples pierced and threw my back out. 🙌
and i thought it was paint or jizz but it was cheese
please tell me you didnt taste test that
How does one take the "you're the best sex I've ever had but I'm marrying someone that's sub-par in the sack" mind fuck?
I pity the fool.
Thanks Mr T.
The amount of guys I've turned down for you is disgusting... You better love me.
I woke up and couldn't find her. She had somehow managed to get into the closet and lock herself in. She was crying for her boyfriend. Thirsty Thursday at its finest
Did I ever tell you what happened that night after he ran you over?
Randomize
