I just didn't expect you to be so naked....
I just saw grafitti that read "Mug The Fart Eater". Really, Memphis? That's all you've got?
she's naming her girl london marie
that kid will be born with a tramp stamp
Congratulations on your moose knuckle.
Thank you. Really, it was an honor just being nominated.
Its official. Iv'e been kicked out of a bar in every state. I would like to take my job and travel time for allowing this to happen.
I woke up to my dog puking on my bed. Looks like it was a successful night for us all.
I just had a vision of confetti exploding out of someone's vagina to the sound of air horns... I think that would be welcoming.
I like the way you think.
btw theres a pine tree in the downstairs shower. the guys thought it would be a great free air freshener.
I guess I made wings because there's chicken everywhere. Even on the walls. 3 of them. It's like a chicken grave yard.
Where are you?! I require drunk, males and possibly crying. Vomiting is optional and/or optimal as is karaoke.
So I guess I bought a cat last night. Fuuuccckkk.
How many Wendy's frosties do you think it would take to fill a bathtub?
We just had sex on an abandoned logging road while wearing snow shoes. God bless Montana boys.
It was a fun night. I made out with the door guy at the gay bar but he didn't speak english
There was no door guy at the bar
Probably not. Getting pulled over and puking my guts out on the side of the road in front of the cop and him making fun of me, was not my finest moment. Plus I lost my debit card.
Randomize
