My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
just met our mailman at a party, he asked me out. i said yes, but only if he picks me up in the mail truck. how jealous are you
He keeps whispering to me that he can't wait to tie my hands up with my wig?
Oh my God, I want him to live with his face in my vagina forever.
She had another shot and asked if I wanted to taste her tongue ring. Then I helped her pee.
my heaven will be filled with hot naked men covered in chick-fil-a sauce and me wearing a bib
Do you think there are other mothers looking at porn in the carpool line?
I literally cut myself out of my pants. What is my life.
AND I HAVE A NICE COCK! A STRIPPER TOLD ME SO IT MUST BE TRUE!
I'm not dropping acid and watching game of thrones with you. That just sounds like a disaster waiting to happen.
This weekend I turned down sex to watch the Star Wars marathon... Is this growing up?
your mom was just petting me...I am strangely comfortable with it
What? I'll do just about anything if you give me a sticker.
Turns out the grown up version of seeing your teacher shopping is seeing your therapist is on tinder
When they said they were gonna tattoo each other's gamer tags on their asses, I knew I no longer had a boyfriend.
Randomize
