i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
She spent a lot of time to get her cleavage to look that good. It would be rude not to stare. It shows you are paying attention. Chicks dig that.
I'm just gonna be the bigger person here and say I want you inside me
I ended up taking shots of whiskey and chasing them with potato wedges, I have never felt more Irish
and then you seriously asked him to senior prom..which freaked him out since you told him earlier you were 22
One good thing about being a mom now, I can tell which guys I'm dating were breastfed and which weren't... By the way they latch on to my breast during sex! Kinda kills the mood.
okcupid is pretty much insisting i hook up with this chick who looks like andy milonakis.
I never forget a pussy, even blackout me gives me that memory.
If i'm forever fucked up in this state of mind then I'm going to kill him for this
Just watched a girl lose her dignity at the corner...it's not even midnight
I think someone cast a spell on the lazy stoner rich boy stereotype and it came to life and called me.
You were a cyclone of alcohol and bad decisions - like a gay Tazmanian devil
I vomited out my contact lenses last night
we f'd six times
f'd?
its sunday, i cant say fucked
My sister can't give you a handjob and us still be bros.
Randomize
