If there was chocolate on Regis Philban's dick, I would totally lick it off. That's how desperate I am for some right now.
watching law and order svu marathons. all of the sex crimes cases start like my sat night.
Nicole wore just a belt and her pedometer and hopped on top of me last night. She "walked" 822 steps before we finished.
New charity walk idea!
I've developed breathing exercises to keep myself from puking..
Yeah someone just put a trash bag that says "use protection" on the snow penis
apparently i was cut off before i even walked in
I'm Still in a robe trying to piece together 3-7am I'll be there in a few
New level of high: If I could bathe in my salsa right now I would.
think he just told me if I need to shit I should go outside.
Worst drunk idea ever... Me "Cops are looking for two guys, one in a grey shirt one in a blue shirt" jelly "lets take out shirts off they'll never find us" of course I thought it was brilliant
come home. I need you. I'm too hungover to deal with this hangover alone
He said it wasn't ladylike of me to drink more whiskey than him. I told him to stop being a little bitch.
I wanted to buy shoes but nothing fit. So i'm getting a vibrator.
he asked me where I was going to school, and then we started having sex, and I answered his question forty five minutes later after we were done. It was the chilliest thing ever.
While we were doing it he looked up at me and said "Does your husband fuck you this good?" Talk about a mood killer....
Randomize