The dr is doing well, he randomly asked if I was bi
Ok let's jusst not talk today bc then we'll just do dangerous things but I'll say hello
Even if you were sober, spitters are STILL quitters, end of story.
It's almost summer. We need to start reconnecting with our home drug dealers.
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
there is no 'pace myself' on the blackout express
Also on a more serious note, what says pull my hair more: straight or soft curls?
he definitely had sex before you were fully potty trained.
I have a very hazy flashback of me making out with a guy in a seashell bra??! Can you confirm or deny
Why are we so great
Like I'm def going to a therapist but I wouldn't change a thing about us except maybe the peeing
She was hammered and showed her gay best mate a pic of my cock, his response was "I fucked the wrong brother"
On a side note apparently my brother is gay
He took a shot of vodka and AND ATE ME OUT AS A CHASER. YESSS. I AM IN LOVE.
I'm not just straddling the line between love and hate, I'm dry humping the shit out of it
A black cat walked my drunken ass home last night and made sure I made it back into the apartment safe. Sat with me for 30 minutes as I struggled to unlock the door. Guardian angel or drunken hallucinations?
A total of 3 guys left my apartment this morning. That was my first clue to my black out endeavors last night. Gotta love wine Wednesdays.
Randomize
