Have you ever secretly resented a girl for wanting to have sex when all you really wanted to do was rub one out and go to sleep?
Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
Dude.. I don’t care how hairy she is, you already left me at the bar, and now I have to find another fucking way home... NOW BE A MAN ABOUT IT!
I can blatently call girls sluts here and they think i'm speaking norwegian
It's almost like sex with her has gotten boring... like it's still good, but the creativity is lacking... it's times like these that i wish she still wanted me to gag her
i thought they made a 7-hour walmart run, but they were actually in jail.
grown man stumbling drunk down green street wearing nothing but a hot dog costume and crying. its not even noon yet.
You should seriously consider super glueing your knees together
The power of my vagina can withstand any attempt of celibacy
I feel like a fucking princess. Like an heiress of a kingdom of drugs.
My picture of a beer can in a McDonalds cup full of ice got more likes than my relationship with her. Is beer THAT much better than monogamy?
not totally sure where im at but i think i've definitely woken up on this couch before. bong on the coffee table looks familiar. should be able to find my way home
I HAVE NEVER BEEN FRIENDZONED IN MY LIFE AND THIS GIRL IS GOING TO MAKE ME QUESTION EVERYTHING. LIKE A GODDAMN CUNT. A WONDERFUL, BEAUTIFUL, MAJESTIC, LESBIAN CUNT.
my ex logged me out of his netflix so im gonna fuck his bestfriend as revenge
You rolled over grabbed my crotch and said "that's my waffle." I'm sleeping on the couch next time.
my penis made a compromise with my morals
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