can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
I can handle NPR. I speak hippie. I took it in college.
This guy legit just tried to LSAT formal logic his way into my pants. Contrapositives and everything.
I have to stop drunkenly making out with guys just because they're tall or have a beard.
my drunken justification for peeing in her closet was that her shoes were ugly
perfect irony that i'm celebrating international women's day with a yeast infection
COME GET ME FR THE HOSPIGAL'!!!!!
My philosophy professor just told the class that he is suspicious of dolphins. The stoner in front of me totally gets it. I need to start getting high for this class.
The other day I was really high and I felt like my words were coming out of my mouth in flowers...I don't know.
Can my mom come with to the bar? Prince just died and I feel like I need to take her out to cheer her up.
I swear if you laugh while im moaning i will immediately stop and go home.
I need a pedicure
You need to go to planned parenthood
fuck sobriety. I want to wake up tomorrow in a park or some shit.
He drove me to my therapist appointment because I was too drunk to drive. Total keeper.
hey can you send me that pic of that dude?...if this isn't Rochelle's phone...can you please find and tell Rochelle to send me that picture of that dude?
Randomize
