margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
We walked into the bar in The Flying V formation from The Mighty Ducks. We were ready.
Apparently oprah and I were in competition to see who's ass could get bigger this summer
I hate it when hot girls behave. It's so anticlimactic
I just saw a homeless guy on rollerblades; I don't think I've ever felt sorrier for someone in my life.
So I made him an imaginary sandwich and told him that the day I didn't have to fake it, neither would he.
also I just used a straw to drink the juice out of a tomato b/c I forgot how to bite.
I've heard so many rumors about me being taken home in an ambulance I'm starting to believe them.
Snuck into a camper in someone's yard. Hotboxing. Can't wait until they go in it.
Yeah I mean its Vermont, not like id be the first guy to trade pharmaceutical services for beer
So we came to a decision, you need to fuck your hot roommate and send us pictures. We voted, so don't hate the democracy this great country stands for
I miss my bedroom and my bed and being able to spray myself with my choice of 15 different perfumes so I don't have to wake up to the smell of my past sins
Don't get mad but There's blood everywhere and the only thing I remember is the bj from your cousin.
Just got a handjob in my psych lecture. You were right, going to class is paying off.
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