I had so many friends before that round of Never Have I Ever.
Suck a a big bag of reindeer cock bud. Sent from church. See you in hell
Are you still giving blowjobs?
Who is this?
shape ups are the best shoes to wear when youre stoned. its like walking on little trampolines every step.
My shirt is ruined. If I ever get the idea of doing a tequila shot through my nose ever again, shoot me.
I want the one making out with the dumpster. Is that bad?
Dude. Zebras have bad attitudes.
you puked on the porch, i can see your jacket on the floor next to your underwear. i know your home, unchain the door, you're the worst roommate ever.
I feel like emojis are just meant for explaining sex without using words to make anyone uncomfortable. It's a true gift
We are such grown women, dealing with life's problems one shower beer and reckless makeout session at a time.
I started crying during a meeting at work and now I'm sitting on my couch drinking boxed wine at 1:30 in the afternoon. Fuck you too estrogen.
Everytime I feel sad about the break up; I recall that she is a Bernie supporter and feel all better
the girls would appreciate it if you invited over some drunk, single, straight men with low standards.
PANTIES FOUND
Your vagina must be outstanding or have a secret entrance to Narnia if someone is will to fly from Texas for one night of it.
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