I thidmdmk you'gre a special person
Who wants to bang the sort of girl you can get with Axe body spray??
The background of my phone is you taped to the wall wearing a cowboy hat
As shirtless as possible
Have you ever had one of those moments when you kept whispering to yourself "I'm not a slut, I'm not a slut..."?
Just caught my dad doing coke in my bathroom again. Guess whose getting a new car for christmasss.
I just threw up over a bridge. I didn't even know there was a bridge in this town. Vodka is like a transportation device.
I'll just be sleeping in this laundry room. Come get me at bar close.
woke up to a family dragging me under their beach umbrella, they poured water on me bc they "thought I was dead" then fed me quesadillas and nursed me back to health... gotta love Cabo
I find it fascinating that she'd be more comfortable with her mom finding out she submits dirty disney confessions on tumblr than about her secret email account she uses to chat with dutch and brazilian strangers.
The guy who's car I hit last night just followed me on Twitter...not sure how to feel about it.
Just witnessed some guy throw his fake eye at his dad's face. Actually, he whipped it at him.
They filled a kiddie pool with lube and glitter.
drunk me always erases text conversations because she is a woman of mystery and does not like for me to know what's going on in her life
First night in my new place, I had to get drunk to get used to the idea of shitting in a new toilet
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