I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
I'm in a strip club that reminds me of a crack house from the 80's.
If its called oral, why is it so hard to talk?
smoking weed is really the only logical conclusion to hangovers
hahahahaha your sister just walked down from the guest house with a stain on the front of her shirt and "owned" written in blue sharpie on her forehead. i dont think she knows what happened last night either.
So... Apparently, "Home" isn't the correct response when a cop asks for your address...
You took my underwater blowjob virginity.
Well, most of my extended family doesnt know about my love for the penis, so they dont have a reason to disown me
May 25th. Drunk Laser Tag party to celebrate our bdays. May 26th. Mushrooms at Chattanooga Aquarium. Damn
You called me a pussy and continued to eat an entire jar of peanut butter with only your hand.
The paramedics were not my fault this time.
I bet, I woke up to you like naked at 4 in the morning shoving a sandwich in your face
I lost a bet last night, now I have to name the baby Fetty Wap, regardless of gender. Riley is going to kill me.
Just fell down the stairs..might wanna call the ambulance jus take the weed out of my pocket be4 they come..
I need you to sex the hangover out of me again.
Randomize
