so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
my mom hid the smirnoff from me. this is the most fucked up game of hide and seek EVER
counting down the days left of school on my birth control packet.
Aside from the fact that there's a penis in my mouth, that's a pretty good picture of me
Apparently she came home completely covered in mud, pretending to be a bird...and she still had more sex than any of us this weekend.
We were trying to sober you with hotdog buns but you refused put half of it in your bra and said you'd save it for later
I'm glad they extended train service last night. People crying, screaming, throwing up, fighting and peeing themselves on a train made me feel like I've got my shit together.
Before I left he insisted on serenading me with a ukalele. I might be a little bit in love
I almost spit out my drink. But only almost, because it was vodka. And you don't spit out vodka.
He told me that when he bends me over that chair I remind him of a bull rider. So thanks for being the ex that helps my present sex life
He was doing dishes, naked. I dropped to my knees and gave him head. Teamwork level- pro..
Thx for last night. I've never had so much fun while being told my life decisions are questionable at best.
he was wearing a widestriped red gingham suit jacket with complete sincerity im not surprised she beat the shit out of him
When we found you, you were half crying/half singing Taylor swift songs at 2am in the bathroom, and occasionally puking. I think I get "friend of the year" award just for putting up with your drunk ass all night.
after that bj i gave him, i could fucking punch his mom and he wouldn't give a shit
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