Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
It's true. Ladies love me because I'm so strong and they feel safe. Not because of my pseudo charm and their impaired judgement after several drinks...
My boobs aren't big enough for this kind of lifestyle
My therapist is concerned about your alcoholism.
just found a someones bra in what seems to be a mix of pickle juice and vodka in my fridge. Who was over here lately?
There are eight sets of guys I've made out with who have the same name. It's like noah's ark in my mouth.
I'm lowering my standards just so I can get laid, but I draw the line when a guy spells cool kewl
My roommate was being an ass so I put everyone's drinks/shots on his tab for the entire night. Then when we left he was telling me how he got out cheaper than last time.
I saw the attitude and didn't even try. Line of the night from one guy who talked with them for a while said, "I don't meet you standards. I have a job and would treat you well." She was blank faced.
I was doing karaoke to "baby got back" and apologizing for being white at the same time.
So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here?
I just ordered a "football meatlong" from subway
Did you really just reference your penis in a pep talk? I think I may love you more now.
Best and worst whiskey dick ever. I am hungover and can't move from the hours of sex, he on the other hand has a raw bruised dick. I win.
On a scale of 1 to 10, with 1 being “good” and 10 being “banging a student’s father”, how bad is it that I’m banging a student’s father?
Randomize
