I will show your tits more attention than Michael Jackson's death.
I just saw a man salute the budweiser truck on the highway. I want to follow him and shake his hand.
These 5 days benders will be the death of me. Just living and breathing is a struggle right now.
there is mayo everywhere what the fuckkkk
and you wish you could be eating a cookie right now. but all you get to eat is a penis
Had no idea what his name was when I woke up. Went through his desk, found his tax records. Ben. And loaded.
I need a thor helmet and I need to find my heavy duty drinking mug
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
I need a genital shamwow being this wet.
I want to have sex with Will Smith. I guess I have a thing with 90s sitcom stars. Stamos, Joey Lawrence, John Goodman.
I re-seduced my fuck buddy...must be the luck of the Irish!
Do you wanna fuck while my apple pie is in the oven?
I just remembered something. We made out last night, people cheered.
he's such a nice guy...he deserves a bigger dick.
He nailed that bed down really well so it won't break again. All I could think while he was nailing it was "challenge accepted".
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