So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
I don't even know why I got my vag waxed
Ugh, tell me about it. As each day passes and the hair grows more, I get a little more depressed.
Made it home ok. Only got hit by one car.
I'm going to do lines of vitamin c I cannot be sick for halloween
I like to think I'd be good at dodging genitalia.
I was looking at your puke while I was peeing in it the next morning and that ceasar salad did not treat you well
Good news. Hiccups are gone. Bad news. I had to set the bathroom rug on fire to get rid of them. Don't come home until the fire truck leaves.
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
Im going to bed. I'm seeing 7 of everything and my world smells like gravy
I'm still pretty drunk right now, but when this hangover hits me, I'm going to be super pissed. It's a preemptive never drinking again.
I have a lot of questions this morning, most of them start with "Did I..."
Well if she's the kinda girl that doesn't want you after seeing a pic of your balls squeezed together, she's not the girl for you.
The one time my sister did shrooms she thought she was thumbalina. I can't live my life that way
Just spilled a coffee mug full of scolding hot oatmeal on my bare dick. Hope you're having a good Friday night too.
You fist bumped my dick last night saying good game. That you'll be back for the 2nd game...
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