Our friend ended up naked, bleeding, requesting we throw a couch at him cause he was convinced he could block it
We did he did.
When I say naked, I mean penis exposed. Not in boxers
No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
Best. Four. Twenty. Ever.
We talked about all of the sex positions that would better allow him to feed me grapes. I think I'm in love.
he said i looked like a lion with slutty lingerie on .
I'm finding that as the end of the quarter approaches, the list of things I refuse to do sober keeps getting longer.
I have no valid justification for peeing in your kitchen, but I don't think it's worth breaking up over.
who put toothpaste on EVERY doorknob in my house?!
He just called me juicy booty via text message.
when i first looked at you, you weren't wearing any pants. but then i realized you had them around your neck as a cape.
He referred to his penis as "a gentle giant" and said I had offended it
Why is it that every study session with you turns into a hunt for drugs?
I accidentally kneed him in the balls while trying to straddle him so we ended up spending the night watching ffm porn online
Se wrote an essay in class about proper and fashionable winter wear for dogs. Of course I regret fucking her.
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
Randomize
