Just crossed the line with my beat friends girl twinsie. Didn't realize tillz afta how much the look alike and an thougholy creeped out. Thanks ciroc
2 am we went back to his house. his mom handed us beers and cooked us pancakes. the next morning his dad had washed my car. i lied. living at home after college definitely does not suck.
His shopping cart was nothing but malt liquor and zucchini.
Ah shit... I sleep-ate chocolate pudding again.
You told me that you only walk into walls because it makes the room stop spinning.
speaking of graduation plans, i'm blacked out eating sausage
Two words that describe last night: naked and backflips.
No I just rolled on the floor giggling. I think that's the equivalent to a post sex victory dance.
We are so blessed to to have nicely shaped vaginas
I thank god almighty everyday
I curse you to think about Guy Fieri whenever you have sex with your lady.
I'm sending you a dick pic. Ill tell the other ppl in this pancheros its cool
Don't send a pic of dick unless it's inside the burrito
Just had a threesome with a married couple.
Stop living my dream.
honestly the most stressful part of moving is the chance my mom will find my vibrator
I wasn't supposed to sleep w him. So of course I sent him gps location to my bed.
He is farting the alphabet right now. In the goddamned restaurant. You don't get to recommend men anymore. Or restaurants for that matter.
Randomize