We should go out drinking together soon
I'm still not going to have sex with you
i just borrowed 5 dollars from my eight year old sister. i'm at a new low
Pls stop me from telling anyone else my broken blood-vessel + splint are "climax-related" injuries.
bowling with tennis balls and shot glasses. whatever you dont knock down after 2 rolls, you drink.
Thank God. You really dodged a small penis there.
I'm going to listen to christmas music to trick my body into cooling off.
Just walk-of-shame'd past fifteen little girls at summer camp. Take a good look girls, I am you in twelve years.
He screamed "Hug me!" and dove into the bushes. How he gets laid every weekend is beyond me.
So I fucked her. If you're keeping score at home, it's all tied up with horrible sex with someone I like and great sex with someone I hate both with 1.
I woke up wearing a lax pinnie under my shirt, a triathlon medal, and a dora backpack... I think I had fun
That feeling when you're ready to convert to the religion of whatever god will stop the vomit. Dynamite is illegal.
I just wish he'd leave so I can vomit in peace.
Yeah, it was all very half-hearted. In the middle of sex we both just stopped and looked at each other and said, "can we just sleep instead?"
That is so sad.
Can't really tell your Mom you are moody due to dick deprivation.
we've dated a week and made out twice. he is taking it slow. but his body is stupid sexy. just want him to stop respecting me and fuck me like a gutter slut. respect me later im not getting younger.
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