I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
Some girl next to me in class is making a list of whta to pack for spring break & it was a normal list until she put birth control in all caps w/ stars around it
I was surprised he admitted he couldnt keep up. We both knew but usually they dont come out and say it
The pregnant Hooters waitress told me to "make good choices".
Fortunately for myself I'm twice as smart and half as drunk as everyone else. All things considered I'm leaving here three-to-five times richer than when I arrived.
I wish I was a power ranger. Also the universe is immense. Like it never ends. Never.
What if I told you that I had 160 ounces of cheap malt liquor in my backpack? Espn films 40 for 40s presents: Edward 40 hands. Our room. 11PM/10 central
Teaching my class, used paper clips to fix my hair. Too hungover to be a kindergarten teacher.
It was like a Thanksgiving meal, which you spend 8 hours cooking, and the family wolfs down in 20 minutes. All that flirting and build-up for like 90 seconds of pumping and he was gone in a flash, never to be heard from again.
So my quick shower turned into a "lay in the shower and let the hot water reign over you because you are too hungover to wash your hair" shower. I'll be there closer to 1:30!
But for real though. That weed tastes like the jolly laughter of Santa Claus.
I made him watch the first 5 episodes of Game of Thrones before I decided to sleep with him.
I can't believe my vagina just got wished happy new year
Can't we just go back to fucking and having your boyfriend think you're completely straight?
Periods are much less exciting when you're not sexually active.
Randomize
