I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
I'm in a subway station watching a tranny do her makeup. This is like watching a unicorn giving birth.
i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
I dreamt I won the Huge Cock Championship last night. It was glorious.
Watching Fresh Prince at 9am with a beer in hand and he just said to Uncle Phil "Sometimes I worry that I'll never get my life together." I feel like that was a sign from above or something
her boyfriend dumped her for my exgirlfriend. so filming our hookup is pretty much a definite.
Also, did that cop draw hearts on everyone's hands last night?
explain the broken jalepenos in my underwear drawer?
he was once again the drunkest girl at the party
You decided that walking wasn't in the cards for you anymore
Can we put this graduation on the shelf figuratively and go drink
She said if her future children dont have blue eyes she wont love them
Like I'm getting finger banged and my family is making cookies in the kitchen. Talk about terrifying
just because i'm not a monk anymore doesn't mean I need to tell you about my new sex life.
which is fantastic by the way.
You is single now. The world is your ass buffet.
Randomize
