my brain is sober enough to have a conversation.. but my arms feel nice
somehow in between the body shots the bong hits and trying to convince the 7-11 lady to let me fill up my vodka bottle with cherry slurpee. i misplaced my car.
): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
accomplished twins. life is a go
the number of months ive had a girlfriend in my life divided by the number of blowjobs ive gotten is extremely depressing...
i mean, we fucked on the futon in the garage where his band practices. pretty sure im now obligated to like his band on facebook.
we're havin a 400 loko party for joe pa's 400th win. come get loko
I'm holding onto the sink for dear life. Pretty sure if Iet go I'll turn into a shit propelled man rocket.
So his 25th anniversary post of love to his wife was almost verbatim what he said to me last week. Does that mean I win or lose?
I tried to settle their lesbian roommate fight by turning on Pretty Wild
You were peeing off the rooftop and told everyone sometimes you just gotta go
By talk things out did he mean have passionate angry sex?
Can I come over and use your shower? My roommate got drunk last night and took my bathroom door off its hinges
He had been licking my nipple for like 5 minutes and it wouldn't get hard. He asked me to lick my own and when I did, instant hardness. I realized I'd rather have sex with myself then this guy ..
On cleanup... i've counted 94 solo cups so far.. oh, and i found a miniature top hat in the microwave
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