At a stoplight watching a woman push groceries in a stroller while dodging oncoming traffic... Reallllly Detroit?
When she sits down, she uses her fat rolls like an arm rest.
Just did the walk of shame across state lines...milestone?
Give me one situation where peeing in your garage could be a bad idea
You put Smirnoff in your grape juice and called it communion...
Shitshow foam night was such a success
Full contact beer pong was definitely not my best idea.
Hey, if I'm gonna bastard a child and ruin his life, I'm going balls out.
Yo, I can't just ask my mom where she relocated my vibrator to, can I?
You paid a stripper $40 to choke me out last night.
She's calming us down by shoving oreos in our mouths
I was just doing the math on how much beer we need for the houseboat. in doing so, I came to the conclusion that we need to open a beer distributor business.
I'm gonna send you a dick pic now just so your uncomfortable at work
I never thought I'd say this but there's too many dicks around here.
Let's just wait to see what happens before we start making radical plans and starting fires
Randomize
