Yeah i knew he wasn't okay when he told me he was "seeing his vision"
Please tell me nicole sent the picture of the ejaculating penis to you too, otherwise I'll feel really awkward
i was that girl throwing up in the urinal. it was a dark moment in my life.
Nicole, you can't keep coming over at 3am wanting to build igloos.
You blacked out and walked in on my neighbor breast feeding at 3am yelling "where is my best friend". I think we should go apologize.
It was awful. Their identical twins so it was like having sex with Jeff wearing a wig and shaved legs.
KEG. KEG. THE OPERA HAS A KEG. KEG STAND IN A TUX. AFTER PARTY RAVE AND KEG STANDS.
Have you seen our bachelor? He's MIA. Last seen being led to some hookers by Kanye look-a-like.
He invites me over too FucK and i wind up eating 6 jimboys tacos with his roommates. While he waited in his room. Maybe next time
Stop saying "make it happen". I'm not gonna say "hey, you should get naked with your sister and roll around together while I penetrate you both"
Yes. Do not say that. That will not make it happen.
Still. Make it happen
You're right. I woke up today with my ugly sweater still on and no pants. I'd say it was a successful night.
well that's what you get for sleeping with a guy called 'the defiler'
I am naked and annoyed.
The comfort of this onesie is keeping me single
If I die tonight somebody's going to have to let all my tinder matches know.
Randomize
