didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
Thats not how I planned it, its just the way she passed out
What do you do when the person in the stall next to you says they're jealous?
I'm currently trying to figure out how I woke up naked and handcuffed to my bed. Not real worried about class right now.
Balcony sex scratched the shit out of my phone. Whups.
No, trust me. Falling down the stairs is a fucking sobering experience.
when I came to get Jamie there was a cop standing outside with her, made me roll down my window to tell me "she's got to go cause she won't keep her shirt buttoned"
do you remember in the middle of fleeing from the cops you stopped in the middle of the road to make out with quail man?
my dad is now demonstrating how to start a fire with a tampon. happy fucking new year!
Oh and I'm kind of in the library.
Waiting for the foreign guy who keeps staring to make his creepy move.
Evvvvvveryone knows we hooked up in the DJ booth. People call it the BJ booth now. I've created a legacy
Someone has big plans this weekend. Just went to throw away the trash and saw packaging for 3 different vibrators on the top of the stack
Any man who can do squats while fucking you is a man worth keeping.
Went home last night with that hot British guy. Sounded like I was f-ing in a Harry Potter movie.
Yeah I'm just gonna stay here and spread my horniness to the world.
Randomize
