Don't really want to talk about it. You were right. She had a whole jar of toenail clippings on her nightstand that she chews on "when her fingernails are too short." Direct quote.
Yeah. I hotboxed a windbreaker.
it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
american apparel?
try lime green
On the bright side, at least we arent the generation raised by fucked up teen moms.
Finals week has gone away, doo dah doo dah, drink martinis naked day oh da doo dah day
His dad asked what he was doing so he texted his FATHER a picture of me wearing his shirt in his bed.
Some cougar Brit said she loved me. America is bouncing back.
After he finished he sang his college fight song like it was some victory
she got the mcdonald's logo tattooed on her ass. sober. yesterday at noon.
Sorry I just took 4 pills about 20 minutes ago so I'm feeling like a claw machine like people tell me were I need to go and what to do and I'm just like yes sir so I get the teddy bear but I set it on fire and it's kinda black on one side and there might be smoke coming off it.
During sex his mom asks from the other side of the door, "Do you like avocados?" Who doesn't like avocados?
The more I think about it, the more convinced I am that I'm the solution to all of T-Swift's guy problems.
I just wanted to personally thank you for throwing clementine slivers at me across the room while we made out
I guess daylight savings isn't a holiday we need to celebrate for three days...
I don't know how to explain to you that you tried to recreate the bit from the Dana Carvey show where a guy dressed as Bill Clinton breastfeeds a bunch of puppies
Randomize
