: I need to find myself a plastic surgeon husband so i can get boobs.
but u need boobs to get one in the first place.
Dipping chips in queso and thinking of your beautiful face
He's getting better. i'm using GuitarHero to teach him how to finger me. My clit = the red tab.
turns out a healthy dose of cleavage is the equivalent of a swig of felix felicis
If I die I am blaming you for not answering to tell me the proper dosage of horse tranquilizers to take
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
Oh, and no balcony sex...trust me.
And now thanks to shrooms we all got a terrifying glimpse of what goes on in his head. I will not say I didn't see it coming when it turns out he made a suit out of people's skin
I will accept it in the form of tooth necklace but if you have better ideas I am open to suggestions.
I'm just trying my hardest not to get addicted to drugs or pregnant and all your other friends are out there getting married
Nothing like drunkenly buying a pregnancy test at 8 am to get out and realize your nip was out the whole time.
Only you would get a side of potential vagina with your sandwich
I’m not closing myself off the to the possibility of making a bad life choice.
If you don't sing 'dust in the wind' at my funeral, I'll haunt you forever
I don't feel like that was meant as a compliment, but really still feels like one
Randomize
