Dude, she's so old there's a chalk outline where her reproductive organs used to be.
his penis was crooked so i rode him at an angle. he seemed used to this.
Its a long story, but I have superglue on my tongue
My uncles bleeding, my brother has a black eye and my moms topless in the pool... How was your family cookout?
Some asshole just brought BK into my summer class, im already high as hell, i did not need another way to not pay attention
Only she could turn her genital wart appointment into a date night.
Never again. Her vagina looked like a sad old man.
You put your shot glass in your waistband and then told me how convinent it was.
maybe you should do the old hyperventilate, take a shot of vodka, sniff someone's hair trick
He asked for a foot job. Whatever. I guess I'm swimming in new slut waters tonight.
Just did an entire nights worth of bar crawl in an hour. Boom
shes making a cheerios necklace using dental floss 'just in case' she gets the munchies later
My vagina is screaming your name . Wtf did you do to it
Awkward sister question: which game of thrones female left would you fuck?
I need a conscience and I need it yesterday.
Randomize
