stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
I was looking through my facebook friends list to see how many ppl on the list i've hooked up with, and was effectively reminded of my failed friendships, relationships, fuck budy-ships, friends with benefits, and "i cant remember if i ever did shit with him but we're awkward now" ships.
OMG THIS GUYS LICENSE PLATE IS GETTNHRWET
he was so high that he wouldn't speak to anybody for like 30 minutes, he'd only gobble, like a turkey.
she just convinced the cop to buy us ice-cream sandwiches. best/worst stoned experience ever.
There are lots of gay asians. This is better than i was expecting
Most violent shit of my life. New Years resolution of eating better is already kicking me in the face.
i have two emotions: emotionless and blind with rage
I woke up with a stapler in my ass. Don't even complain to me.
So the day after the 4th I'm sitting here drinking Molson and watching NHL free agent frenzy. From patriotic American to drunken Canadian in 24 hours flat. Booyah.
Woke up to the frozen soundtrack blasting in the living room best one night stand ever
I HAVENT SEEN A PENIS IN 5 WEEKS I REFUSE TO REMAIN CALM
I stole the butter cup cuz i brought home my rolls and chicken and didnt want the butter everywhere. I miss your body because its amazing.
I have only been here for a week and might contributed to a dumpster fire on accident.
We're hate flirting, damnit.
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