i effing cant stand that stupid soul the new way to roll hamster commercial. everyone im with is laughing and now hate them all.
First, he can't make me cum.. And now, he can't get it up because he LOVES me?!!??! i don't think so.
There is a reason Crest White Strips don't list masturbation as one of the myriad of activities to do while whitening your teeth. A very good reason.
you kept telling everyone that you were the mayor of silverware town
he called AT&T to make sure that he had insurance before he threw his cell phone into the fountain.
don't forget friday is see who can get the most free drinks at the gay bar contest. winner gets $50
I don't know. I was also picked up by the doormen and held over the bar so I could do an upside down shot out of a bartenders tits.
Ur dog was like a damn middle school chaperone this morning trying to lay between us after what he saw us do last night
he said "be careful" then handed me a cheezit...
I'm in the ER bruh, I went skinny dipping last night and a cat fish bit my dick.
He went down on me to the national anthem being sung by Jordan sparks. It was very patriotic of him
So my family just woke up on Easter morning and shared a bowl. That's bonding😊
Calm down I'm not kidnapping the bartender
Remember when I convinced you to watch me eat my sandwich just so you could reuse my plate and save us money on our water bill? I'm so ecofriendly when I'm high
you never know when your going to find a surprise from me in your bed...it keeps you on your toes.
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