your transformation into a slut upon entering college is like a shakespearian tragedy
If we're like this now and women reach their sexual peak in their 30's, I can't even fathom what our futures hold.
I introduced him to the male G-Spot. Don't ever tell me I'm not experienced.
My grandpa just complimented my boobs. Im taking this as a compliment but also brushing it off as alcoholism on his part.
she gave me one of those friendship bracelets and said as long as I wore it it was like an all-access pass to her vagina
When the doctor said the anal leakage might not be reversible without some lifestyle changes you start asking if it's worth the entertainment value.
He asked me to spit in his mouth. I did. Never let me hook up with this guy again.
Psh a bachelors degree is the new adulthood. We're all just pretending anyways. I'm sitting on my boyfriends couch while he's passed out drunk. In my lap. On a Wednesday. And he's a nurse. See, pretending to be an adult
I just found out that I slept with Kate Gosselin's publicist back in June . Brb I have to wash myself endlessly.
I was scared that I should know him but I was too busy blacking out to remember
Watching videos from last night and u go "I should be the president, I can get whatever I want w my tits"
New rule: I am no longer allowed to speak
She had a belly button piercing in the shape of a cross. Talk about mixed messages.
Sorry for trying to baptize you last night
You knew the entire thing in Latin I was so impressed
I just saw a guy in a zippo shirt buy 2 gallons of fire starter fluid and then proceed to smoke a cigarette. I feel like hes got some big plans for his tuesday.
I just found a baklava I forgot I got last night so we can call it a day
Randomize
