girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
I puked for half an hour, but I went and danced afterwards, and that made me feel better.
You are so irish.
I feel like somehow my uterus ended up in my ribcage from all the keg stands i did last night..
Tonight marks the 1 yr anniversary of me waking up in a bush. is that reason enough to celebrate?
It's basically the same plan, only step one gets revised to "look hot enough that he forgets I fucked his roommate"
Remember when puke and rally meant a good time? Fuck pregnancy
I'm afraid I might run into that fat chick that sucked on me in the hospital parking lot while her friend cried in the car next to us, but I may be willing to take that chance.
I'm going to fix your towel rack. I broke it while I was dancing on it.
He said he actually "met" me for the first time through a picture his housemate had of me, drunk and passed out in a pool of my own vomit, on the floor of his basement.
Landen experienced Greenville for the first time last night. He was awaken by 2 cops and 4 EMS guys this morning in the bed of that truck that is for sale at the swashbuckler carwash, said he was trying to walk to waffle house... Greenville- 1, Landen- 0
I'm gonna celebrate Valentines day by watching Bob Ross videos and tripping balls.
I'm listening to Michael Jackson while drinking vodka, alone. Honestly, l wish I could Moonwalk my way back to when I knew wtf was going on in my life.
I'm waiting for your stupid pizza and this 400 lb drunk man is behind me singing the acapella version of Elevation by U2
Haha I wasn't coming anyway. I'm watching Snow White and don't want to put pants back on. Those are completely unrelated. Have a good night.
Our relationship revolved around Taylor Swift albums. It's no wonder it ended so fast
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